Reporter On Scene Of Crash At Teterboro Airport

Not making fun of this morning's crash, but I found this one reporter with her questions annoying this morning. I decided to dedicate this "Lani orignial" story to the anchor woman.

Jane: "We're gonna go to John where he's live at the scene of a plane crash this morning at the Teterboro Airport. John..."

News reporter John at the scene.

John: Thanks Jane. A corporate jet sped off the end of a runway while attempting to take off from Teterboro Airport this morning, hurtling across a highway during the morning rush hour and slamming into a warehouse. It is not yet known what exactly has happened to the plane, if the plane actually took off or if it was still on the ground when it went out of control. No one knows if anyone has been hurt and if so, how bad. But one witness said the pilot crawled out of the wreckage and said the crew lost control of the plane.

Jane: Is this so called pilot blaming the others for this crash, John?

John: Well, Jane, there isn't enough information right now to confirm that. But someone did say that two guys came off with their hands cut. Also that the pilot dragged himself out. And that he literally crawled out like a baby. But this is all speculation at this point.

Jane: So do we know if the plane took off the ground and then lost control, John?

John: No we don't know yet at this point. An investigation is going on right now and I'm sure by the end of the day today, we'll know more details. One witness said the plane never made it off the ground after sliding and skidding down the runway. But we couldn't really take his word on it as he was on his way home from work this morning with a bad case of whiskey breath. As you see behind me, Jane, the fire is out of control right now and we have not heard if there were people in the building at the time of the crash.

Jane: Do we know, John, if and how many people on the plane were hurt?

John: (*sigh*) No, Jane. No one has any confirmation on what exactly happened this morning and no confirmation on how many people were on board. The plane was schedule to depart at 7:09 this morning and instead crashed. We don't know yet if it was techinical problems or if there was some sort of situation like a struggle or some sort. We don't know yet.

Jane: So you're saying there was a struggle between a passenger and the pilot of this flight? Is that correct?

Frustrated with Jane, John stands still pretending to not hear Jane's question.

Jane: So where was this plane going to? Atlanta?

John: The plane was heading for Midway Airport in Chicago early this morning.

Jane: John, any word on how the plane lost control and why it chose to hit the building?

John: JANE! I'M ON THE SCENE OF A PLANE CRASH THAT JUST HAPPENED 20 MINUTES AGO. I DON'T HAVE ALOT TO GO ON RIGHT NOW. CAN YOU STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS I DON'T HAVE ANSWERS TO?! DID YOU NOT HEAR WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING ALL THIS TIME?

F&%@!!

Jane: (she takes a short pause) I think we're having some technical difficulties. We've seem to have lost audio on John. We'll go back to him later in the program for more details of the crash in Teterboro Airport. Bob?

Bob: Thanks Pain, I mean Jane....dumb bitch... And now the weather with Ron Dodgers....