Trying to Lose Weight

My cousins use to call me Olive Oil...from Popeye. Cause I was tall and skinny growing up. They all had their curves. Big asses, while I had none. I got teased in school cause I was skinny. When I was a teenager...late teens, I met this guy. We went out for years. Although I wish we didn't. So as I went out with him, notice him looking at bigger booties. Bigger thighs. Bigger everything. I always had boobs, so I never worried. But I was not happy with myself cause I was way too skinny. I wore a lot of baggie clothing because back in the 90's that was the style. And you saw videos that made fun of supermodels who were skinny and didn't have that "rump." The "Rump Shaker" video played on and on for days. I started to hate it because he couldn't stop watching it. Then there was a girl in the video who looked like a girl he was friends with. So you know how I was feeling..... One day, someone told me, "Hey, you're gaining weight!" (May he rest in peace now. That was Harvey. He just died about 2 years now....) So I looked at myself and say, "yeah, wow. MMMM I like it!" I slapped a little ass and I was happy. I had something there! I was feeling SEXY!! Then one other time later, this guy tells me I gained weight. But this time, it didn't make me feel good. So I started to talk about it and that Christmas in 94, I got myself a 2 year memebership to the gym!! Was this an insult?? It could have been. But I didn't take it that way. I was happy to have gotten it. I always enjoyed working out. I use to sit in my room and lift my father's weights to make my legs look good. I would put on my high top sneakers and hold the dumbell weights as the sneakers protected my ankles and do leg lifts a few times a week. 500 leg lifts each day. The weights were light, but the reps made them stronger. So I was on my way to the gym. For the first couple of months, I didn't workout right. Then my friend Mike took me to his gym. Gold's Gym. I saw men everywhere. I could not believe how big there where. It was scarey. I don't like big muscles like that. Plus, they are so into their work out, that the little "gym bunnies" who hopped around in the tight outfits and makeup....well they never got attention. Guys like to work out. Well those types do. So, Mike worked me out. He said I should be feeling this, that, blah blah blah... And at the end, my legs felt like spagetti. I could not walk down the stairs. I had to hold on to the railings. "LOL" He laughed. But said it the way I have to do it. I would like to say Thanks to Mike for showing me the way......"Thank you, Mike, for showing me the way." Now...a moment of silence............................................................................. ........................................................................................................................................................

Ok so, now that I am working out, I get measured. So I'm like, a 32" waste and all. I worked so hard that later I lost the weight and was now a 26" waste. So for years I stayed at 130 - 135. 2000 I'm still the same, but by 2001 I start to gain. We hit 2004 and I weigh 154lbs!! I was so depressed. All my clothes were not fitting me. I started buying large. Large this, large that. Then I went away on vacation. And after I saw my pictures, I felt horrible. I mean, we all go through this. But it's so hard to deal with. I started to sit at home and cry. I wouldn't do anything. I wouldn't even get naked in front of my love. I was too ashamed. I started going back to the gym. Bought myself a 2 1/2 year memembership. Started working out in March. I said by September I want to be 138. That was my deadline. So I started working out, but then I stopped for a month and a half. It was a struggle to get there. You play mind games with yourself. You're really not tired. It's ALL IN YOUR MIND. So you sit on your couch. Stare at the tube and say to yourself. "Get up and go to the gym." Then you roll over and take a nap on the couch. This goes on for days and weeks. Then a month, a month and a half. And BAM!! "THIS IS BULLSHIT!! WHAT AM I DOING SITTING ON MY ASS!! I WALK BY THE GYM EVERY DAY ON MY WAY HOME!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHH!" I'm shopping for shoes. I like shoes. No, I love shoes. My feet didn't gain weight. I have narrow feet. So I buy a pair of shoes. But you know, you wear the shoe and then comes the outfit. And well, it's not really working. I mean, people say you look good that way. No don't lose weight. "Shut up!! What do you know!!" It's usually the people who are chubby themselves that try to stop you from losing. Look, don't try it. My cousin is fat. Always was. I would go to the family reunions and all my cousins who made fun of me are not huge. So they say to me, "man you're skinny. Man, you gained weight, you look good. Man, are we starting to join our club??" SNAP! My picture was taken right just then. I was photograph looking like a deer in headlights after that comment was made. So now, after all this, I pushed myself hard to get to the gym. I started the gym again in mid June and said Sept will be my deadline. I worked out 3 to 4 days a week. EVERY week since then. 30 minutes of cardio and then hit the weights. Cardio on all days then one day arms and the next legs. Then rest. The End Results I went to the gym and weighted myself. Took measurements and found that I lost 16 pounds, from 154 to 138. Lost 3 inches in chest, 2 1/2 in waste and same on hips. I'm happy. I started fitting into my clothes better. The struggle was hard. As I said, it's all in the mind. You say you can't but you can. If you push yourself and go to the gym, you'll be happy in the end. I say a good month or two of pushing yourself to the gym and it'll become so important to you. Like you can't breathe without a workout every week. 3 times at least. It addicts you. You then want to be active. And the couch won't miss you. Don't worry. It probably got tired of your fat ass sitting on it. Trust me.

NOW GO WORK OUT!!!